Saga Mix Up
by Unwary Hanyou
Summary: A mixed-up parody of DBZ. It'll go up from the Raditz Saga to Buu Saga, not in order, though. I know it says Humour, but its serious, too. More about that in one of the chapters' author notes. Chapter 6 up!
1. The So Called 'Frieza Saga'

What if everything was mixed up? That was a very bad question. For the DBZ characters at least. In this fic, the Sagas are mixed up. The order is SUPPOSED to be

Raditz

Saiyan

Frieza

Android

Cell

Buu

But I'm gonna mix 'em up! I'm gonna use 17 and 18 instead. Easier to type. Well, here goes!

**Saga Mix Up**

It's five years after DB, and Goku was headed off to the Kame House, to see all his old friends. He was taking his son with him. His name was Son Gohan, named after Goku's grampa. He was very young, at the mere age of seven. On top of his red hat, was the four star dragonball, gleaming in the morning sun.

The Kame House came into sight. Goku could see his friend Krillen waving. He touch landed and flashed that famous Son grin while waving goodbye to Nimbus.

Gohan was busy holding down his hat. He was also enjoying the wind and the nice day it was. He knew that if he lost the pretty shiny ball on top of his head, Daddy would be mad.

* * *

Meanwhile, Demon King Piccolo (no, not the flute, you bakas! Why would a flute be a demon king?) was meditating, as usual, when he felt a great energy. An energy that by far surpassed his own. The energy was headed for him. A weird white guy with dumb little horns sticking out of his head, sitting in a floating chair came. He had a funny green device on his head, perched over his right eye.

" Only 322, Green Bean? How pathetic. A small gust would be enough to blow you into space!" And that's what he did, except it wasn't a small gust. The small man(assuming he WAS a male. He sounds like a female. I'm not really sure) flew away.

Piccolo flew up, the wind so strong, but thank Kami for his weighted clothing. It was heavy enough to keep him down.

* * *

Back at the Kame House, Goku took Gohan, who was hiding behind him, up to the gang.Krillen looked down at Gohan. "Hey, Goku, who's the kid? You babysitting?" Goku looked down at his son and laughed. "Him? no! He's my son! Everybody, meet Gohan!" Krillen looked surprised, as did Bulma, Yamcha, Tenshinhan, well, everybody. "Your son...?" Goku stared at them. "Well, yeah! Why not?"

"Nothing..."

Gohan looked at the gang and remembered to introduce himself. "Hello everybody. My name is Son Gohan. I am four years old."

Bulma looked at Goku and said," Four and he's already so polite? ChiChi, I guess?"

Goku chuckled and replied," Of course." Then Krillen cut in.

"Did you, like, train him?"

Goku frowned. "No, everytime I tried to, ChiChi whacked me with that damn frying pan.", he answered disapprovingly.

"WHOA! Did you guys just feel that enormous power?"

There were nods and then that same funny little man (I think) came down in that flying chair.

"Hello, earthlings. My name is Frieza. You may now bow down to me."

"Why would we? C'mon guys, let's get him!"

Before they even got to move, Frieza read their power levels.He got:

Three Eyes- 250

Scarred Guy- 170(Yamcha, since it wasn't obvious)

Short Floating Mime- 145

Baldy- 206

Old Man- 139

Guy with the Freaky Gravity Defying Hair- 330

"Weaklings. This won't take long. The strongest isn't even 100th of my power! 330! What a laugh!"

The Z Senshi flew at him.

So this begins the "Frieza Saga".

I know! You're all thinking ,'Where the bloody hell is Zarbon? Or Dodoria? Or any henchmen? Well, Frieza came with nothing but his flying chair. But still, whaddaya think will happen? Think they'll die? Probably!

_P_

_L_

_E_

_A_

_S_

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_R_

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_V_

_I_

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_W_


	2. Blast of Doom

Well, I'm updating because I got a review! One whole review! Thanks, Sonar! I'll try to put some more details into it! To tell you the truth, I'm not really the descriptive person. But I'll try. 'Thoughts'

**Saga Mix Up**

Frieza stepped out of his chair and put one hand behind his back. The Z Senshi started throwing punches at him, kicking him, but to no avail. Frieza blocked every one of their attacks were blocked by Frieza. Krillen gapped in amazement. "He blocked everything with ONE hand!" While he was being an idiot, Frieza took the offensive.

He charges up a ball of ki while the others were attacking him. Frieza let them attack him, because he knew none of their attacks would harm him. With that in mind, he launched the beam. He wondered if they would survive this, for this was his weakest blast. Only a power of 7,000 was in that blast.

Goku saw this a threw a counter attack, even though he sensed it was much stronger than he was. He put all his energy into this one. His 100 pound shirt was already removed. Luckily for him, the blast was very slow. So he kicked off his boots, too. From his scouter, Frieza immediately saw his power jump from 330 to 600. ' Even so, it's pathetic.'

"KAME…….."

Frieza, once again, saw this. His power was going up even more. 700….750…..800……

"HAME……."

900….950….'He is still pathetic, with his strongest as 1000.'

"HA!" and he released the blast. He was losing badly. Hey, what did you expect?

1000 VS 7000?

Piccolo dropped his weighted clothing(turban…etc.) and flew towards the battle, when he sensed the ki. The noted scouter told Frieza about the power boost of Green Man, and that he was coming. 'A boost of 78? Wow, I'm so scared. 400.'

Piccolo stared at Goku and Frieza after he landed. "Well, Goku, looks like your end will come sooner than I expected. But, I'll be the only one to kill you. I was hoping to save this for you, but I guess I'll use it now. Special….Makkankoupousou!" and launched a beam with another beam spiraling around it, forming a drill that merged with the Kamehameha. The blast immediately gained more power.

While he was charging, Frieza examined him. "500….600….700…..800……….900……..1000…….' The end result being 1440. 'Still weak'

The battle just evened out a little, though the odds were still against Goku. Now it was:

2440 VS 7000

Tien took this in and decided to help." C'mon guys! Let's help! KAMEHAMEHA!" and he shot a pathetic 250 kamehameha(well, it's his best) at it.

2690 VS 7000

Krillen joined in. "KAMEHAMEHA!"

2896 VS 7000

Frieza didn't kill them while they were trying to defend themselves because he enjoyed watching them stuggle. He knew even with their combined their efforts they wouldn't even break 3500. (The power of their blast is their power levels added up)

Chaot-zu came in. "Dodonpa!" followed by Roshi's "Kamehameha!"

3177 VS 7000

They were going to lose and die.


	3. What's that Funky Smell?

I'm back! Wow! I'm surprising myself! So many updates! Three in two days! Well, they're short. I've got a few more reviews too! Replies:

The X- I know! It's not funny yet! But give me a break! It's only two chapters so far! It'll get funny. Anyways, the original DBZ was pretty serious, I'm just twisting it.

Kate (chapter one)- He HAS a floating chair, not he IS a floating chair. That would be pretty funny lol.

Kate (chapter 2)- I not gonna kill them, YET! It's not time yet. Can you guess how they win?

Yes, can YOU guess how they win? Tell ya what. If you're the first person to guess correctly, I'll put a special scene in at the ending of the chapter where they win, so that'll give you about two chapters time before it ends. If you guess correctly but you weren't the first, you'll get an honourary mention. Anywho, here's the chapter!

Saga Mix Up 

The blast was about to hit them. They were about to die. (YAY! I mean, nothing….) They had thoughts just before the Kamehameha blast was getting destroyed. Goku was thinking'_ I wonder what kind of food is in heaven?' _while Krillen was complaining '_This is the SECOND death I'm going to have! _SECOND!'.

Tien was looking at Choatzu and sulking '_I didn't even get to tell Choatzu that I love him and I'm gay.'_

Roshi was being a hentai, as usual. '_ I wonder how many pretty girls are going to be in the Other World?'_

Choatzu didn't really care. '_Tien, tien, tien, He keeps forgetting I can read his mind. Oh well, I'm gonna die. I didn't have anything to live for, anyway. I mean, I got a gay guy after me!'_

Piccolo didn't have thoughts. I doubt he is able to.

When they were all about to die, it stopped. They looked up to Frieza. He looked pissed. He was grumbling.

"Stupid crappy ass powers. Damn it. I hate this. Damnable pills."

Frieza opened a bottle and popped a few pills into his mouth. When he noticed all the stares, he explained himself. "Well, y'see. A long time ago, when Earth (I think that's what it was called), when puny and pathetic creatures called dinosaurs ruled this poor excuse for a planet, I inhaled a cheeseball. It went down into my ki chamber(I'm making all these organs up), the source of my energy. It blocked one of the passages, and my ki energy was limited. So then, I thought the logical thing to do was to flush it out, naturally. So I took I giant swig of urine down my nose. It didn't do anything. But, I have learned to use my ki now, but it stops once in a while. I can only use blast weaker than you. Now! Highest 150! Let's just sit around, for the pills work in giving me back my chi. Only a couple more hours left."

Krillen laughed at him. "Sorry, but we got a planet to save! Let's go, guys! Prepare to die!"

Frieza launched five 150 balls at them. After they exploded, the Z fighters were unharmed, but they stopped. Goku wrinkled his nose in disgust. "What's that funky smell?"

Frieza smiled. "Oh, I forgot to mention. The urine didn't do anything, except now all my ki attacks are 75 urine."

* * *

I bet now, to popular belief, that Frieza is going to lose because of the disease. But he's not, so don't waste your review on it. Remember, review! 


	4. The Training Begins

Okay! I'm updating AGAIN! You people better be happy about this! Viewer responses:

Tea- Yes, it should! Thanks!

Kate- I accpet that. I think I can safely assume that was a flame. But, I will not change it. That is my style of writing and if you don't like it, flame me : ) I said already, they aren't gonna die, yet. Besides, they die in the actual anime, so I have to put in at least ONE death of a good guy!

El Loco Uno- Twanks fo' da cokie! Ahem! Thanks for the cookie! Don't worry! The earliest I'm going to stick Raditz in is AFTER Goku goes Super Saiyan. Muahahahaha!

Please read the note on the bottom. If you flame me for something that is mentioned there, you WILL be ignored.

This chappy ain't gonna be that humourous. It's sole purpose being to give you people time for that contest. It's probably going to end at most 2 or 3 more chapters. One chapter for each pair's training.

**Saga Mix Up**

Krillen looked dumbfounded at what he(she?) just said. He put one hand up vertically and the other horizontally on top of it, forming a T. "Uh...time out!" Then, under his breath, he muttered, "Time for a shower..."

So then Krillen went inside to shower. Tienshinhan was smarter and jumped into the sea. The others, except Krillen, of course, followed suit. They came out almost immediately, though. They, once again, flew at him. After about 10 minutes, they finally realized that they weren't harming Frieza at all. They went into intesnse training. but before they started, they asked, "How long does this usually take?" They were happy with the answer.

"Before, when I said a few hours, that was the industrial strength pills. These are the weak ones. Around a week or so."

Usually, this would have been plenty time, enough for them to surpass Frieza. But, since this is when Raditz was supposed to be here, not Frieza, they didn't have Gravity Chambers, and the Hyper Bolic Time Chamber was not well known. So you know what they did? They killed each other with weights.

Goku's 100 pound shirt was replaced with 250 pounds as his 50 LB boots were replaced with 100 pounders. Piccolo was the obvious sparring partner for him. Piccolo, was now sporting a 100 lb. turban, with a 250 lb. wooden thing with a cape ( I have absolutely no idea what it's called.)

They were paired up with the people closest to their power levels. Tien (250) was paired with Krillen (206), who was wearing the 150 pound turtle shell, after his shower, of course. Tien relieved Goku with his old 100 pound shirt and the 50 lb boots. hey, the weaker train with lighter equipment, don't they?

Yamcha (170) is going with Choatzu (145). Yamcha using the same stuff Tien was using. Choatzu was training with simple 75 pounders.

* * *

Soon, Yamcha and Choatzu found themselves some barren deserted wasteland (they always fight in some deserted stretch!) and started to spar. Goku had made a quick stop at Korin's place for some sensu beans. He got 7 beans for everyone. One for each day of the week.

(I, personally, find fight scenes hard to type, so don't flame me for any horrible bad fight scenes)

The fighters their stances and circled, waiting for the other to move. In the end, it was Yamcha who made the first move. He ran ahead and began to throw punches at Chaotzu, who easily dodged them all. He floated up, higher than his opponent. Yamcha, naturally, having mastered the art of flight, went up after him. Choatzu anticipated this, as he shot a Dodonpa wave at him. It hit it's mark, as Yamcha was now falling towards earth, the energy beam pushing him down. When he reached the ground, it exploded on him.

As the smoke cleared, Choatzu landed and watched for any sight of Yamcha. Yamcha, came out of no where and stuck the mime with a roundhouse kick to the head. He flew into a nearby cliff and was buried under rubble. Choatzu slowly came up and dashed at Yamcha. He threw a barrage of punches that were blocked. Yamcha started punching and kicking, too! So that it went. For Yamcha, it went:

Punch kick kick punch block dodge ouch kick ouch ouch ouch punch headbutt dodge block.

As for Choatzu, it went as:

Block dodge block block punch kick headbutt ouch punch punch kick ouch ouch body slam kick.

At the end of the hour, both fighters were exhausted. But, the fight went on. Choatzu once again flew up and shouted "Dodonpa!". It came towards Yamcha. But this time, he was ready. "KA...ME...HA...ME...HA!" and he released the blast. The blasts countered each other and exploded, blowing away noth Choatzu and Yamcha. Choatzu gathered up his energy and released a final Dodonpa against his opponent. Yamcha, who was also preparing a blast, released the Kamehameha the was infused with all his chi. The blasts fought hard at each other. They both won.

Choatzu, who was smarter than Yamcha (who is an coughidiotcough) turned his Dodonpa and headed it at Yamcha. But, unfortunately for him, he forgot about the Kamehameha. So, Choatzu's wave hit Yamcha and his Kamehameha hit Choatzu. Ouch.

Afterwards, Yamcha popped a sensu into his mouth and put one in Choatzu's. "C'mon Choatzu, let's pack it in for the day."

The next day, Yamcha decided to put on a 125 pound shirt and 75 pound boots while Choatzu put on 100s. They were going to double how much they added everyday. And that went on for the week.

* * *

To you people who aren't good in math, that means:

Yamcha started out with a 100 pounded shirt and 50 pound boots. That's 200 lb. He added 25. 100+25125 50+2575. 25 250 175 and 135. Then 275 and 235. Then475 and 435... the list goes on. Next time:

Tien and Krillens training.

NOTE: This story is only a bit humour. Don't expect everything to be humourous. Things can and most likely will get serious for a chapter or two, then get humourous, then serious again. Thank you for your time 

_**REVIEW!**_


	5. Tien and Krillen's Training

Sorry for the long wait! I just didn't have any motivation! Well, after this and Goku's and Piccolo's training, the contest'll be over. No one tried, anyways...I'll give a hint...Goku goes Super Saiyan. Guess how. kay, thanks, and read the chapter. Oh, and the training chapters are just here to give you time for the contest. And stick it up in the page of updated fics so more people will come. I hope. Onto the chapter now!

**Saga Mix Up**

The world was a blur for Krillen. He was spinning around at an incredible rate. Tien was swinging him around as fast as he could, so he also couldnt see much. He finally let go, and Krillin crashed into a rock and into a dinosaur, immediately killing it. It was the third day of training, and none of them ever took off their weights.Right now, Krillen had a 600 pound turtle shell on with 300 pound boots. His shirt, was 550, not as heavy as the shell was. tien, on the other hand, was wearing a 950 pound shirt and 500 pound boots, as he wasn't going to where a shell ("That thing's so, so, _freakin' ugly!_")

(PS I SUCK at writing fight scenes, so please don't flame me for that.)

Tien flew up to where Krillen landed and was greated by a small Kamehameha. It hit him in the face and right before he landed, Krillen kicked him back into the air. Then he jumped up and landed a roundhouse kick to his gut, sending Tien into several rocks. Krillen followed up with many ki blasts to the general direction he was going. Finally, he cupped his hands together behind him. "KAME...HAME...HA!" And he sent the destructive blast towards Tien's crater. Krillen waited for the blast to explode. But it didn't. He found his strongest blast being held off by a Dodon Wave.

At last, the Kamehameha was overcome by the Dodon Wave and it hit him in the chest. It sent him flying into the ground. A blur came out of it and started punching and kicking Tien. Well, trying to, at least. Tien was blocking everything. To us regular humans, it would look like he was dodging and blocking with ease, but the real case was that he was having a hard time keeping up with Krillen's blows. Finally, one hit him and he just couldn't keep up anymore. He then got pounded by Krillen and landed in the ground. Krillen himself was about to collapse from exhaustion. Tien flew up and punched Krillen with all he had. Krillen formed an X with his arms to block, but he still went flying.

Tien smiled, "This is going no where, Krillen."

"Yeah, let's end it. It's getting late, anyways."

It _was_ getting late. The sun was just peaking over the horizon. Krillen smilled.

"KAME..."

"DO..."

"HAME..."

"DON..."

They put every last ounce of ki energy left in them for this one blast. They let loose at the same time.

"HA/ WAVE!"

Then, yep, you guessed it, the blasts exploded on them, blowing them all away. Tien landed in his previous crater as Krillen landed in the hole he had made earlier during the fight. Tien got up first. "C'mon, let's train for another hour or so. No fighting, though. We need to take it easy. Phew..." Krillen stood up. "Yeah. I'm pretty tired. Only five thousnad pushups for me today."

* * *

Well, that's it! Was that a crappy fight chapter or what? Next time, Goku and Piccolo's! That will be the second last training chapter. The last one is they all get together and fight in a tornament-like thing. A six people tourney. Gonna be pretty short...well,

_**REVIEW!**_


	6. Gohan's Incredible Strength

More training! Bored of it yet?

Tea- Yeah, they are more interesting if you're reading and not writing, though. Thanks! Neither could I. I don't think I could even withstand 25 pounds!

Ok, here goes.

**Saga Mix Up**

Sweat formed on Goku's face. He was having the hardest time of his life. He had almost nothing left and he knew it. He had to finish it off once and for all, at once. He took a deep breath and opened his mouth.

The spoon flew in his mouth as fast as it would go. Goku ate every last bite. Piccolo just stared. How could he withstand the stuff? Piccolo had given his share of Bulma's cooking to a dinosaur, which he had killed in a few minutes. 'Well, back to sparring.'

Piccolo spoke. "Ready, Goku?"

Goku drank a _lot_ of water and nodded. He flew at him at top speed, which wasn't as fast as he would have liked to go because of his weighted clothing. He was wearing a thousand pound shirt, 850 pound boots, 1 000 pound turtle shell and five hundred pound wristbands. Thats a total of 3350 pounds! Piccolo wore the same total weight, but without the turtle shell.

Goku was about to kick as Piccolo braced himself, but it never came. In fact, it went right through him! Goku suddenly appeared behind him and landed a roundhouse kick to his head. He followed up with a ki blast with a fair amount of energy in it. Piccolo caught the ball of ki and threw it back, with extra force behind it. Goku tossed it away and started erracticaly punching and kicking him. Piccolo, who wasn't prepared, was hit everytime.

Piccolo finally managed to catch Goku's fist and threw him away, where he crashed into the ground. Goku got up. "Well, that was a good session. Now, howzabout we get serious?"

Piccolo smirked. "Fine by me, but it's your death wish." He was about to attack when a small voice came outta no where. "Can I play?"

Goku turned around to find his 4 year old son standing behihnd him, sucking on his tail. Goku looked at him sternly. "Gohan, we are not playing. I'm sorry, but you can't join us. You might get hurt."

Gohan looked hurt. "Please Daddy? Just for a while? I wanna spend time with you and Mr. Piccolo!" Goku was surprised. "How do you know what his name was?"

"I heard you calling him that."

"Oh. Well, fine, but only for a bit." Then he whispered to Piccolo, " Can you please take it easy on him? He's only a child."

Piccolo looked at Gohan, as if he was evaluating him. "Fine.", as they started off again, with Gohan in. Goku looked at his child."Gohan, please summon up all your strength and try to attack us as much as you can. remember to block, because we will also be attacking."

Gohan nodded enthusiasticly. "Okie dokie!" and he began to power up. Piccolo and Goku looked taken back by Gohan's amount of power. On a scouter, it would be reading 1,150. And that's a lot from a kid of his age. He flew at them with speed no one thought he was capable of and started attacking them furiously. "Take this! And that! And some of this!", Gohan screamed as he punched and kicked while blocking at the same time. The grown ups were amazed. He was managing to keep up with them! Even though they were holding back a lot, this was a great feat!

Gohan finally landed a kick on Piccolo, who knocked into Goku, who fell. Piccolo was gaping at Gohan. 'That actually hurt me...'

* * *

Another chapter! In _two_ days! Better be happy about this! And watch out, I'm going to start the new chapter tomorrow! Wow that's a lot of updates! Look out for that! 


	7. Tournament Set Up

Ok, I said I'd update tomorrow since my last update, but i didn't. Its not my fault! I blame it on...um...him! points to a chair

Well, anyways...

Tea: Thanks once again! Yep, Gohan was strong, that, he was. And I don't know. Really. I woulda died by now if I had eaten that.

And now...Introducing my new muses for this fiction...Goten and Trunks!

clapclapclap

**Trunks: Elvis imitation Thank you! Thank you very much!**

**Goten: Hi!**

Onto the story!

**Saga Mix Up**

It was the fianl day of trraining, and they decided to train together, in the from of a tornament! So, they gathered together and had ahem _gotten_ permission to use the WMAT ring and the announcer dude. You know, blonde, sunglasses, et cetera.

They were even going to have an audiance! They had put up posters a couple days before. So the stadium was packed. The announcer looked up. "Ladies and gentlemen, the fights will begin shortly after we decide who's fighting who. But, todays fighters are going to be...Tien! Junior(Yeah, he still uses that. Let's just forget the whole, "I am PIccolo reincarnated thing!" from DB)! Choatzu! Yamcha! Krillen! and please welcome back last time's champion, Goku!"

The crowd erupted. Let's just say it wasn't pretty for the two people that had super enhanced hearing. Piccolo had ripped his ears off and Goku was covering his ears until the point that no blood could get to a part of his head and his ears. Seeing this, the announcer spoke once again. "Please, quiet down! _NOW!_"

A couple of minutes later, the pairings were announced.

Match One: Tien V.S. Piccolo

Match 2: Goku V.S. Choatzu

Match Three: Krillen V.S. Yamcha

Because there would be 3 winners, it would go like this. Thw winner of Match One would face the winner of Match Three. The the winner of match 2 would face the winner of 3. If they both beat match 3's winner, they would fight each other, If one lost against the winner of 3 and one won, the one who beat 3 would win it. Confused? Let me put it simpler.

Say Tien, Goku and Krillen won their matches. Tien won Match One, Goku won Match Two, and Krillen won match three.

Tien would have to fight Krillen in a one on one. Goku would also have to fight Krillen in a one on one, after Krillen had a break.

If Tien and Goku both beat Krillen, they would fight each other. Say Goku beat Tien. Goku would be the winner.

But let's say Tien lost to Krillen but Goku beat Krillen. That would mean that the weakest was Tien, because he lost to Krillen.

Krillen would be put in second, because he only lost to Goku, no one else. Goku would be 1st, because he beat Krillen, who beat Yamcha and Tien.

Get it now? No? Oh well.

* * *

Well, there you have it! That'sjust a set-up. The actual tourney begins next chapter!

**Trunks: finishes reading all chapters before What the hell? How come Goten and me ain't in it?**

Well, you sorta aren't born yet...

**Trunks: Oh...**

**Goten: Do you have any food?**

Take a left down that hallway, go straight, walk down the stairway. Look for the string at the bottom. Purposely trip on it or pull it to let it know you're there for the food.

**Goten and Trunks:Runs and follows directions**

Hehehe...little do they know, Vegeta and piccolo are down there, and when they pull the string, they're gonna get trapped by SS3 proof gate. Hehehe...pulls out chair and popcorn while watching on the security cameras


End file.
